romance

Everyone of us are on a collision course with a powerfully dramatic romance, but all too often we do not see signs. Our need to be delivered, a faithful heroic lover and the mysterious activities surrounding the circumstances of our deliverance are all there, but unfortunately many people die never having known they were being romanced.

I saw this randomly on a bulletin...odd huh?

.....Sing Me A Sad Song.....

I'm dwellin on the past
I'm searchin for the exits
on the walls
I'm running fast
I'm taking all your hits
but I'm missing your calls

I've been here before
I know this place
I'm so off shore
I'm losing this race

So sing me a sad song
about (about about) what we learned
yeah sing me (sing me sing me) a sad song
And just let it be heard

I'm drivin by your place
I'm dialing your phone
but I never call
I'm seeing your face
I'm feeling so alone
anything at all?

I've been here before
I know this place
I'm so off course
I'm losing this race

So sing me a sad song
about (about about) what we've learned
Yeah sing me (sing me sing me) a sad song
and let it be heard

I don't know how to make this better
Lord knows I cant predict the weather
Just talk to me, it's a stepping stone
Please don't leave me here alone

I don't want this to be the end
I thought you said that we could be friends
and I can see you on a distant shore
Just be my friend and nothing more

Now just sing me a sad song
about (about about) what we've learned
Yeah sing me (sing me sing me) a sad song
and let it be heard

happy turkey day!

I'm gonna be honest...I'm not to big on turkey:/ There I said it, I do love the ham though! Anyway, yesterday was really fun! I got to drive to yuma (2 1/2-3 hours :[ ), and had some very engaging conversations with my cousin. I hadn't seen her in about a year, and that was for like a few hours so we had a lot to catch up on. It was really great just being around family, there's nothing like it. Now, I'll be the first to admit that my family is not perfect, but I love them all so much! We seem to have a severe drinking problem rooted in our family tree, and it's so funny to see everyone drunk! I had a really fun time though, I played pooled most of the time. I beat both of my cousins twice, but only by default. They both seem to have a problem with the eight ball, it's so wierd. I'm really not that good, but I can hold my own...if I want to :] So when I was playing pool, I was usually found sleeping. I hate a late night before, and an early morning, so I felt that I could go for a nap...or few. Usually I'm a heavy dreamer, and they never make sense, but this time I cant remember dreaming. I know that the average person has about 5 dreams a night, but only remembers one, but I couldn't hold on to anything. I also played the guitar, which was really awesome. My uncle has this super nice ovation with a beautiful finish. My little cousin really likes "We Fall Down", so I played it for her. I even taught her the intro, she wouldn't stop playing it. I honestly can say I didn't have that much this Thanksgiving. I had a few slices of ham, picked at my turkey, and fed my cold potatos to the dogs. What can I say, I'm a sucker for the puppy dog eyes. I had a few slices of pie (pumpkin pie is bomb...the end), and kept stealing nibbles of this banana cream pie, that was amazing! After we were dead tired from the triptophane and full, we thought it'd be good to go home. I snagged another piece of the banana stuff for the ride home, along with some apple cyder. The ride went suprisingly fast, I couldn't imagine why though :] When I got home, I bid thee all good night and crashed! I would say, all in all, it was a great Thanksgiving!

AMAZING

Last night was the best, and something I totally needed! I am definately going back there next week, and so on and so on! I love the environment, and the worship is amazing times a bajillion! Thanks Court, I hope it's not awkward next time I see Kayla. Ah well, anyways I really liked going there and look forward to next week!

I really need to run, certain new knowlege brings anxiety that I think can only be ran off. Pray for my heart, it's hard to forgive. I know I should just be giving everything up to God, but it's hard because I'm holding on so tightly. Pray for me, I really really need it.

shoot

Aint it funny to look back and see how you used to think. I really did love Beth, but I think I'm falling out. Every second I can feel it getting better. I'm pretty sure I'm not going to be going to ECW for a while though. Like before, sometimes it takes a long time for things to be normal again, not just a few days of emotions and a few sad songs. However, I can say that my last post there was some truth to it. I really cant wait for my love, my woman, my perfect girl, MY WIFEY! Lord knows who she'll be though (literally). This whole game is really hard though. I think, ok if I just lay low, God will throw her in my lap. But then I think what if He does, and I just figure that I still ought to wait. I guess it's just a feeling thing maybe. I don't know. I've just always been the girly type I guess. I've always wanted to settle down, get married, have kids, a big dog, and house with a white fence. It's really wierd to think that God has been shaping my mystery girl, just as He has been shaping me. I really cant wait to meet her, or remeet her if that's the case.

Human side speaking now:
I want someone to hold, to love one, to kiss, and to just have. I want some to have me, and love me for who I am. Some people can play the single card, and some actually enjoy it. I, however, I feel that I was meant to love someone, so I'm always in search. I guess sometimes I just jump the gun.

If it's drama you want, then look no further...

I cant tell you how hurt I am, how much pain I have. She was my girl, my love, my everything. She meant the world to me, but I guess the feeling wasn't mutual. This seems so unfair. I give my heart and soul, and I get nothing back. If I was made to love, then where is my love? How could something so great, be torn apart in just two words? I need to feel her warm embrace, I need to hear her loving whispers, I need to hear her familiar heartbeat in my ear. I need her more than I know. I need my love.

Is it wrong for me to think like this?

small groups

We've been having small groups for the past three weeks and I really love it! I like being able to ask questions, but above all I love being able to answer other questions. I think it's easier for them to hear answers for people their own age because it's not just another adult talking to them, but it's someone who they know and someone who's been through it. Don't get me wrong, I know adults have wisdom beyong our years, but it can sometimes be a little easier to relate to. I don't know, it's just cool to dive into the word with people, something that I have been needing to do for a long time.

Christian Club has been going really well. From the looks of it, I'm probably going to be talking on next week. Hopefully I can get Michael in, but I don't know if he's going to be able to. I'll post my lesson plan later, right now I have to get some sleep. Good night :]